A Song for XX
1. Prologue
2. A Song for XX
3. Hana
4. FRIEND
5. FRIEND II
6. poker face
7. Wishing
8. YOU
9. As if...
10. POWDER SNOW
11. Trust
12. Depend on you
13. SIGNAL
14. from your letter
15. For My Dear...
16. Present
Thank you very much, Donny, for kindly proofreading all the translations in this page. (Dec. 2003)
2. A Song for XX
Why are you weeping?
Why are you at a loss?
Why are you standing still?
Please tell me
When will I be a grown-up?
How long can I be a child?
Where did I come running from
And how far will I run?
There was no cozy place, I couldn't find one
Not knowing whether I could put trust in the future
They always said I was a strong child
Even praised me as great because I didn't cry
I never wanted to hear such words
So I pretended not to understand
Why are you smiling?
Why are you by my side?
Why are you leaving me?
Please tell me
When did I get strong?
When did I come to feel weakness?
How long do I have to wait
Until the day comes when we can understand each other?
The sun is rising, I have to go soon
I can't stay long in one place
I had been thinking that trusting someone results in
Being betrayed and rejected some day
I never had such strength at that time
Maybe I knew too much
They always said I was a strong child
Even praised me as great because I didn't cry
As people around said like this more
I came to feel pain even when I smiled
I was born alone and would live alone
I thought it was certainly natural for me to live in such a way
(It is your small, weak-looking back that I remember.)
3. Hana
If I suddenly disappear now, for instance
Would someone search for me?
Can I wait until I'm found
Believing that people are kind?
Which is harder
Becoming a grown-up
Or staying an innocent child?
I'll stop asking such questions
If you bloom ...
In this city crowded with countless people
Is there anyone who listens to me?
Does this continuing, never-ending cry
Reach anyone?
What kind of courage do you need
To grow straight
Just beautifully, being loved
Knowing you will fall some day?
Which is harder
Becoming a grown-up
Or staying an innocent child?
I'll stop asking such questions
If you bloom ...
What kind of strength do you need
To grow straight
Being proud, even if you are stepped on
Knowing you will fall some day?
Which is more fearful
Looking back on the past days
Or looking forward to tomorrow?
I'll stop asking such questions
If you bloom ...
(I watered a flower, and found small affliction.)
4. FRIEND
When I enjoyed myself, laughing whole-heartedly
I didn't notice my happiness
I can't go back, however much I miss that summer
For it was I who let go of that slender but strong hand
As you are important to me, I often don't notice
Losing sight of you
But I tell myself again and again
"You are the one and only in this world"
A wind is blowing, telling a change of season
And I'm afraid that I feel you a little farther away
When we were together, we loved earnestly and shed tears
We were more delicate than now, but our days were shining
When I find something that looks believable
I'll surely reach my hand for it
I tell myself again and again
"Though separated, we are best of friends"
Looking up at the blue sky on a sunny day
Kicking the water of a puddle on a rainy day
I realize again and again
The reason why I was born, the meaning of life
Even on painful and trying days
Even when my heart wants to flee into the night
I remember our days again and again
As my mental support
(You are the one and only in this world.)
5. FRIEND II
What I have realized now at last is
Not how you were kind to me
Not how you valued me
But that you actually had hard days
And sent me an SOS
Before you were crashed with anxiety
I thought I understood you completely
I kept you waiting so long, believing that I'd return
Which was uncertain, until the morning
I'm sorry I didn't know your pain
Did I do something for you
Even once at that time?
My regret is without end
I thought I understood you completely
You were waiting and believing in me
Not knowing even when I would return
I'm sorry I didn't know how you were feeling
Such days as those when you were smiling happily will come again
I have kept you waiting so long, but in the future
I hope we will be great friends better than anyone
I'm praying for strong bonds
(All I can do now is looking up at the sky and clapping my hands.)
6. poker face
It's always easy to cry, but I like to smile
I want your love
My true self is growing dim little by little
In the surging crowds I was searching for the answer that remained unfound
As I get better at telling lies and giving excuses, I come to feel fear in the emptiness
It's always easy to cry, but I like to smile
If I pretended to be strong, I would forget tenderness, so I'd like to be natural
I want your love
People are always alone
So they need someone, wishing to be supported and to support
Nothing is certain, but I have my believing heart
If I find one important thing, I will keep it by my own hand
If I hit a wall too high and get hurt, I should stand up again
I don't want anything else, just one is enough
I want your love
("A meeting" and "a parting" occasionally change a person a lot.)
7. Wishing
I haven't counted how long it has been since we first met
But I feel like spending lots of time with you
Every time I can't bear the loneliness at night, I phone you
"I'll go there at once if you need me", I am saved simply by those words
Maybe because we had similar experiences in the similar situations
I feel you incredibly near
I'm sorry for always relying on you, I can do nothing for you
But I pray more than anyone else that the dream in your heart will come true
Wishing you happiness, together with the person you love so much
When the emotion I had been supressing came overflowing suddenly
You weeped too by my side, and then laughed
We have experienced as many meetings and partings as the stars
I lost more than I gained at that time, but it's different now
I'm always relying on you, but I'll protect you next time
Now I know you are actually not so strong and can't be alone
Wishing you smiles, together with the person you love so much
(You alone know your wish.)
8. YOU
Your profile is so beautiful
That it makes me sad
I can't say a word
And my eyes are filled with tears before I know
You must have been hurt and tired
More than everyone thought you to be
I'm sorry for not having noticed it
Blown by the spring wind, we pictured our dreams for the future
A break in the clouds of summer passed out of sight
The autumn sky was sorrowful, the winter sea was cold
The more we were drawn in, the more quickly time passed
Many incidents
Have come our way
And I'm always proud of you
Being here now
Maybe a person is living
With the memories and feelings
As cannot be expressed in words
Sometimes we get tired, taking roundabout ways
But the place we finally get to is...
I wish to be your support some day
Healing your heart simply by being your side
Blown by the spring wind, we pictured our dreams for the future
A break in the clouds of summer passed out of sight
The autumn sky was sorrowful, the winter sea was cold
The more we were drawn in, the more quickly time passed
(Glass is transparent and beautiful... and is going to break into pieces.)
9. As if...
If we don't meet any more, for instance
Will you say it can't be helped, and give up?
I get tired of living a lie
But I have to say that it can't be helped
Because we can be together, owing to this
I hope we can walk hand in hand like everyone else
That is what I'm dreaming of...
If we don't meet any more, for instance
Will you say it can't be helped, and give up?
Reconsidering who I am living for
I felt I could find the way, but
I feel fear when I think it's likely
You can't tell your real mind because you are too tender
If we don't meet any more, for instance
Will you say it can't be helped, and give up?
If we don't meet any more, for instance
Will everything pass out of my memory in due time?
If we don't meet any more, for instance
Will you say it can't be helped, and give up?
Unlike me, who thinks only of the present
Do you feel uneasy, thinking about the future?
La La La La La...
Some day, some day
We can surely be together...
(You are adulter than me. Only this is for certain and actual.)
10. POWDER SNOW
Please let me be alone
I want to escape to a place where no one knows me
Even if I'm blamed for being wrong
I can't bear any more, I don't need tomorrow
Can I cry to my heart's content until I am tearless?
The white snow will wash and clean the tears away now
Please help me
I don't have any regrets at all
I have always been living in the present
Leaving no images, no footprints, nothing in the past
When the candle melts down and this light is out
Can I shout aloud until my voice ceases to be?
The white snow will allow everything now
So, please
I just want to gather shining snowflakes with open arms
But why... in vain...
Can I cry to my heart's content until I am tearless?
The white snow will wash and clean the tears away now
Can I shout aloud until my voice ceases to be?
The white snow will allow everything now
Can I cry to my heart's content until I am tearless?
Can I shout aloud until my voice ceases to be
Can I cry to my heart's content?
Can I shout aloud?
Till the snow stops to fall
(Negative=Bad thing? It's I who negate. It's also I who affirm.)
11. Trust
I have never believed the red thread of destiny
I thought that fate should be grasped
The world is going around me with so much speed
And makes me exhausted
Though I have been seeking love and a helping hand
I hope to reach my ideal "self"some day
I felt I could be stronger
Since the day you found me
Because I can be proud of myself
I never want to give up
And I waved my hand to the past that disturbs me
You were the first person who told me
What is most important
I have sometimes hesitated to be beside you
Being afraid of hurting someone
I learned incorrectly somewhere
What is true tenderness
I will stop caring so much about what others say
I start getting nearer to your lips
I have never seen eternity
But the two of us now can surely believe in it
I'm no longer alone
Not every love eventually ends
Just as the morning comes even after the longest night
I think I can walk forward
Step by step, trusting in myself
I hope to reach my ideal "self"some day
I felt I could be stronger
Since the day you found me
Because I can be proud of myself
I never want to give up
And I waved my hand to the past that disturbs me
You were the first person who told me
What is most important
(Nothing is unnatural any longer.)
12. Depend on you
If the day comes
When you start on a journey
From that point, let's start together
When you feel you have almost reached the goal you aimed at
Do you notice it's in fact still far away?
How far should you go?
What will you do with the endless days?
If you get tired from continuing to fly for a long time
You can rest your wings
I'm here
If the day comes
When you start on a journey
From that point, let's start together
Do you believe in a ray of light
Or feel frightened in the darkness?
If you can flap your wings no more
Tired from continuing to fly for a long time
I will warm them
It's certain
There is at least one person
Who needs you
It's certain
The person you need is
Always smiling next to you
If you get tired from continuing to fly for a long time
You can rest your wings
I'm here
Everyone starts on a journey some day
And the day will surely come
When we do not care about throwing everything to the wind
Our story
Which has just started
Is filled with anxiety and hope
(I'm here.)
13. SIGNAL
Even if I open a new door and enter into an unknown place
I say definately that I am me
Wherever I am, I will surely survive
To challenge a fight for once in my life
Maybe the past can't be compared with the present
But the future can't beat the present, either
I have decided to take off when the next light turns green
It has turned yellow, stops at red -- Am I ready to go?
I am tired of hearing the noises around
If only one person understands me, that's enough
I'll eat up what I like, leaving nothing
And throw away what I dislike somewhere
It was fun, that time, long ago
But memories are always recalled conveniently for us
Taking a deep breath while confident with my head held high
I can say now,"I have no time to stop, I have no time"
Maybe the past can't be compared with the present
But the future can't beat the present, either
I have decided to take off when the next light turns green
It has turned yellow, stops at red -- Am I ready to go?
Taking a deep breath while confident with my head held high
I can say now,"I have no time to stop, I have no time"
(Then, the accelerator is full. The use of the brake is forbidden.)
14. from your letter
If you get nervous, remember well
"You have only to look at all my deeds"
There were many obstacles
But I cleared them all, you know that, don't you?
I'm by your side, not because I thought you need me
But because I thought I need you
That's all
I don't hope for a lot
I don't want to do the same things again
I had experienced love several times
Hurting others sometimes, but I met you
I'm by your side, not because I thought you need me
But because I thought I need you
That's all
Sometimes at night, I get oppressed with the fear
That you may be gone some day, but I have decided to believe
You see? This is a bet
(What I feel again when I write down the words. What I notice for the first time.)
15. For My Dear...
I may be singing this song
Because I can't say the words I want to say most
The best time are when we are trying
To grasp the happiness we have dreamed of
Because once we reach it
We are seized with fear of losing it in turn
But humans is not so simple
To accept it naturally
Everyone has wounds
So sometimes someone's tenderness
Touches my heart and causes it to ache much
Making me almost cry
Loneliness makes me feign strength
I don't want to be alone
I like to sleep with the relief
That I'm with you
I may go on singing
Hoping I can say the only words I want to say some day
I may love someone
Because I can't hear the words I want to hear most
(My existence.)
16. Present
Because I heard your voices
I could come to this place
Because I have been supported by your love
My voice can reach you now
There are people who must be tired
But always smile on for me
There are people who are very busy
But spare time and hurry to come to meet me
And I thank you
Who scold me when I'm wrong
Because I heard your voices
I could come to this place
Because I have been supported by your love
My voice can reach you now
When we pass each other
I am called to with the words,"Take courage"
And, "I was encouraged by you"
It's I who am encouraged
By fortune and chance
We have this wonderful encounter now, thank you
Because I heard your voices
I could come to this place
Because I have been supported by your love
My voice can reach you now
(I cannot touch everyone. What I can do is to believe that I could communicate.)
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